Good Things Are Going To Happen

Five years passed by since my last entry, and yes, good things have happened, too. In that span of years  I had acne breakouts. Yes, adult acne  that covered my entire face and it was horrible and terrible, yet I hoped for good things to happen. I had few heartaches that needed mending, then again I hoped for good things to come.  They came. And they were sweet and appreciated because I know the feeling before they finally happened. Like how one's supposedly planned wedding came crashing down. And how a dearly beloved has forgiven his love and started over again. It's this kind of feeling. For me more than anything else, good things happened when I came to know real friends who stood by me and were there for me when things were tough.

So this morning while having late breakfast, I overheard two strangers around their mid 30's talking about the other lady's painful dilemma, (whether to stay or to leave her present relationship.)  I couldn't help but empathize with her. ( I am not eavesdropping, they thought I'm a Vietnamese and doesn't understand Filipino.) I don't know if deep in her heart she knows that what she's going through shall pass sooner or later, but right now she needs to feel every pain and cry more tears. But it's something that she said that left me thinking even after they were gone. (And I think the answer came to me at this very moment) She said she knew that she wasn't her boyfriend's greatest love but someone else that "got away".  She knew how her man she regarded as her true love, still loves someone from his past.  Don't ask me how she knew it and how she came to this conclusion. It's called Woman's Intuition.  (If I am part of their conversation, I would have asked by now if he ever tells her he loves her, so as if reading my mind she said: "sure he tells me he loves me, but I always feel inadequate" Gusto kong tanungin kung bakit sya nagpapaka martir kung alam nyang mas mahal ni bf si x? Pero syempre it's a rhetorical question.)

She needs more than the declaration of love. I am not judging the guy, but yes I would like to tell her that she deserves more than his I love yous. She needs the assurance of it. There will be times in the life of a woman that she will feel insecure, however confident she is. More so, she deserves to feel loved, and needed, and respected and forgiven.

What will make love last?  Except for the obvious reasons like commitment, unselfishness, physical attraction, communication) there's more. I guess some marriages lasts because it is comfortable. No, the sky was not bluer like what they say when two people are in love. It's just a familiar hue. Some love lasts because they created new memories and experiences together that will contribute to their growth and wisdom, not relishing the memories of the past. (some people don't mind, but obviously this lady is not cool with it.)

Most of the happy couple I know who decided to stay together through thick and thin knows how to have fun. They surprise one another. (Not those expensive surprises that you can think of). There is understanding. Like you understand that he needs to watch/play basketball games and go out with the guys, and like how he understands that you need to spend some time shopping with your beshies :) There is sharing. You know, parental sharing and household chores sharing :D. There is forgiveness. For being annoying, for being jealous, for going home late, for spending the grocer's money for a mac makeup. There is sensitivity. You know when he walked through the door with that look  that tells you he had a bad day. And that he knows if you woke up the at the wrong side of the bed. And then there is knowing. You know that he will leave that towel in the bathroom. He will wake up in the middle of the night to eat the last piece of donut you saved for tomorrow's snack. He knows that you're going to be late for work and that it's hard  for you to wake up in the morning. He knows that you snore.  But it's fine because you want to grow old along with each other.

So going back to this stranger's problem, After finishing her pasta and unlimited chada (iced tea) and what she said as careful consideration, she decided she's going to hold on. (Which her beshie thinks is a bad idea) I hope she realizes that there is  a difference between her and the x. The x chose to leave. (or so I assumed) I think there are some people who meet that someone that they can not stop loving no matter how hard they try. It is impossible for everybody to understand that or to believe it, but yes (maybe) there are some love that don't go away. And maybe it drives them crazy. However, I think that guy is lucky and blessed to end up with this lady in white shirt with print that says: I GOT THIS SHIRT ON SALE. She added a reason on what will make love last. It's Faith. Because she, too, is that someone who never lets go. Because she knows that good things are going to happen.

Epiphany: Love takes Time

While it's true that people around us would like to be constantly reminded that we care and love them, sometimes, saying "I love you" out loud is not always the correct way of showing it. Take for me as an example, I had been a fool to believe the loudest "i love you" I have ever heard in my entire life. Twice. Yet, setting aside all the doubts that had been drumming silently in the corners of my mind, I took my chances. Never knowing that the hand that promised to hold mine while taking the plunge would hold it tightly until we reached the ground. So there, lessons learned. I need and deserve more than the declaration, "I love you."  I think all of us, whether a student,  stranger, friends, mother, son, father, daughter, etc. deserve more than declaration. Our declarations of love are backed up by performance by our daily lives.

So, while I was resting my injured knee, staring at our apartment building's garden below, came my epiphany. All relationships that we have in mortality, we have to build it worthy to last for all eternities. Showing kindness to a stranger is showing love, even if you don't say it. Giving respect to sinners as a person, and not outrightly judging them; because each of us sin differently from one another, being compassionate, charitable, caring, feeding, are some of the ways to show our love. Even believing in God and loving Him takes time. My Korean atheist student told me that the only reason why she wants to ask about God is because as if  I have this personal relationship with Him. And whenI told her about prayer, faith and hope, she said: "Well you told me  that when I die, you have to find me and tell me about this heaven again, because right now, I don't believe." This  reminds me of a conference article I read long long time ago.

"The opportunities for showing love for God through the home, neighborhood, mission field, community, and family are never-ending. Some of us are inclined to terminate our love processes in the family when a member disappoints, rebels, or becomes lost. Sometimes when family members least deserve love, they need it most. Love is not appropriately expressed in threats, accusations, expressions of disappointment, or retaliation. Real love takes time, patience, help, and continuing performances.

Love of God takes time. Love of family takes time. Love of country takes time. Love of neighbor takes time. Love of companion takes time. Love in courtship takes time. Love of self takes time."

Marvin J. Ashton - 1975 General Conference

BAGAN Enlightenment

‎"But friendship is precious, not only in the shade, but in the sunshine of life, and thanks to a benevolent arrangement the greater part of life is sunshine." -Thomas Jefferson

And so the four of us, plus one local teacher, defied  authorities and Saturday duty and went to our 8-hour trip to Bagan by bus. And the Principal gave in saying we needed this trip for us to be enlightened.  It is said that every Myanmar should visit Bagan  and without going to Bagan you cannot say that you have visited Myanmar.  Mingalabar (pronounced as Minggalabah, which means Greetings!) from the Golden Land! We walked where the earth angels have trod, enveloped in a thick fog, under the morning sun, climbed temples for enlightenment with the four winds, and with glad and light hearts, we watched the sunset from about 30 meters above the ground with wondering awe.

                                  Bagan with over 2000 Pagodas and Temples in upper Myanmar

Ananda temple is considered to be one of the most surviving masterpiece of the Mon architecture. Also known as the finest, largest, best preserved and most revered of the Bagan temples.

Thatbyinnyu means "omniscience" which the Lord Buddha attained on becoming enlightened.  So I guess we got the answers to our questions here =)

Dhammayangyi Temple is noted for its massiveness. The name "Dhammayangyi" as interpreted by scholars, means "The Light of Buddha's Teaching."

While the sun sets...

This was the best trip I have ever had in Myanmar with Amabel, Cheryl and Espe. Miss ZinMin is very cool to join us in this trip. And here is our never ending fun pictures in the Land of Pagodas. Myanmar people lived in these lands for centuries but unfortunately as with everything in Myanmar, the military started clearing them in 1990. Who would have thought I would be here after 22 years?

Parang Living Room nyo lang a :)

Espe's  enlightenment :)

Holding on for our dear lives

Avoiding the Police Officers, hahaha!

THE FOUR GALS : THE ENLIGHTENED

Amabel and I

Yangon Market

"I have found out that there ain't no surer way to find out whether you like people or hate them than to travel with them." - MArk Twain: The Sawyer Abroad

And it's true. I have known Amabel years back in Thailand. A spirited and a witty, funny woman. I liked her then. But being with her in Myanmar is totally liking her to the highest level. And because of our travels together that I am certain that our friendship extends the boundaries of Burma. it is always sad to leave a place to which one knows one will never return. Such are the melancholies of du voyage.  Perhaps they are one of the most rewarding about travelling. And the things I saw in Myanmar, I have seen with the traveller's eyes. And the people I have known, I have come to love. But Myanmar is never an interesting place for me without Amabel and the 2 more gals: Espie and Cheryl. I want to share our travel pictures exclusive of just Amabel and I. We want to make good time, but for us now this is measured with the emphasis on "good" rather than on "time"...

One weekend in AMARAPURA: City of the Immortals.

U Pain Bridge: The oldest bridge in Myanmar

Traveling in other countries is especially fun because others often attribute your differences to the less-stigmatizing idea that you're like this only because you're a foreigner :)

Falling in love is easy. But staying in love is very special.  And this couple found a very special love.

A little imagination goes a long way in Myanmar

RAIN is coming on our way!

It dawned on me, that it is romantic to just sit on the bridge and just talk about nonsense  with the love of your life, while waiting for the sunset.

They are Peter, James and John, their English names.

These pictures were taken at Mem-Yo.  It is just about 2 and a half hours drive from Mandalay City. They say it is cold all year round. So we brought our magic 'pashmina' this time just in case we shiver. :)

The secret to youth is to fill your mind with beauty!

I suppose that every wanderer started in a garden somewhere. So few of us are born into motion.

Foreign lands never yield their secrets to a traveller. The best they offer are tantalising snippets, just enough to inflame the imagination. The secrets they do reveal are your own - the ones you have kept from yourself. And this is reason enough to travel, to leave home.

“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did do... Explore. Dream. Discover.” 
― Mark Twain

The trees grow silently.

black and white

A wise man travels to discover himself.

I travel not to go anywhere, but to go. I travel for travel's sake. The great affair is to move.

I didn't know that the world could be so mind-blowingly beautiful.

In the empty immensity of earth, sky, and water, there she was, incomprehensible, firing into a continent.