Good Things Are Going To Happen

Five years passed by since my last entry, and yes, good things have happened, too. In that span of years  I had acne breakouts. Yes, adult acne  that covered my entire face and it was horrible and terrible, yet I hoped for good things to happen. I had few heartaches that needed mending, then again I hoped for good things to come.  They came. And they were sweet and appreciated because I know the feeling before they finally happened. Like how one's supposedly planned wedding came crashing down. And how a dearly beloved has forgiven his love and started over again. It's this kind of feeling. For me more than anything else, good things happened when I came to know real friends who stood by me and were there for me when things were tough.

So this morning while having late breakfast, I overheard two strangers around their mid 30's talking about the other lady's painful dilemma, (whether to stay or to leave her present relationship.)  I couldn't help but empathize with her. ( I am not eavesdropping, they thought I'm a Vietnamese and doesn't understand Filipino.) I don't know if deep in her heart she knows that what she's going through shall pass sooner or later, but right now she needs to feel every pain and cry more tears. But it's something that she said that left me thinking even after they were gone. (And I think the answer came to me at this very moment) She said she knew that she wasn't her boyfriend's greatest love but someone else that "got away".  She knew how her man she regarded as her true love, still loves someone from his past.  Don't ask me how she knew it and how she came to this conclusion. It's called Woman's Intuition.  (If I am part of their conversation, I would have asked by now if he ever tells her he loves her, so as if reading my mind she said: "sure he tells me he loves me, but I always feel inadequate" Gusto kong tanungin kung bakit sya nagpapaka martir kung alam nyang mas mahal ni bf si x? Pero syempre it's a rhetorical question.)

She needs more than the declaration of love. I am not judging the guy, but yes I would like to tell her that she deserves more than his I love yous. She needs the assurance of it. There will be times in the life of a woman that she will feel insecure, however confident she is. More so, she deserves to feel loved, and needed, and respected and forgiven.

What will make love last?  Except for the obvious reasons like commitment, unselfishness, physical attraction, communication) there's more. I guess some marriages lasts because it is comfortable. No, the sky was not bluer like what they say when two people are in love. It's just a familiar hue. Some love lasts because they created new memories and experiences together that will contribute to their growth and wisdom, not relishing the memories of the past. (some people don't mind, but obviously this lady is not cool with it.)

Most of the happy couple I know who decided to stay together through thick and thin knows how to have fun. They surprise one another. (Not those expensive surprises that you can think of). There is understanding. Like you understand that he needs to watch/play basketball games and go out with the guys, and like how he understands that you need to spend some time shopping with your beshies :) There is sharing. You know, parental sharing and household chores sharing :D. There is forgiveness. For being annoying, for being jealous, for going home late, for spending the grocer's money for a mac makeup. There is sensitivity. You know when he walked through the door with that look  that tells you he had a bad day. And that he knows if you woke up the at the wrong side of the bed. And then there is knowing. You know that he will leave that towel in the bathroom. He will wake up in the middle of the night to eat the last piece of donut you saved for tomorrow's snack. He knows that you're going to be late for work and that it's hard  for you to wake up in the morning. He knows that you snore.  But it's fine because you want to grow old along with each other.

So going back to this stranger's problem, After finishing her pasta and unlimited chada (iced tea) and what she said as careful consideration, she decided she's going to hold on. (Which her beshie thinks is a bad idea) I hope she realizes that there is  a difference between her and the x. The x chose to leave. (or so I assumed) I think there are some people who meet that someone that they can not stop loving no matter how hard they try. It is impossible for everybody to understand that or to believe it, but yes (maybe) there are some love that don't go away. And maybe it drives them crazy. However, I think that guy is lucky and blessed to end up with this lady in white shirt with print that says: I GOT THIS SHIRT ON SALE. She added a reason on what will make love last. It's Faith. Because she, too, is that someone who never lets go. Because she knows that good things are going to happen.